barbecues, gluten, and pavlova

It's barbecue time again. I know this because I have been to two over the weekend. I also know this because I am still suffering from gluten poisoning from the first one. I brought gluten free sausages with me, but they appear to have been cooked alongside all the gluten-containing bbq foods so I might as well have eaten them in a bun! At the second barbecue, this one at the Musician and the Actor's house, the Musician apologised for having "utterly failed" at finding suitable food for me. It was absolutely fine though, as I wasn't hugely in the mood for bbq food. All was made right by pavlova, made by the queen of pavlova, it was brilliant! A double-layered creation with fruit and fruit coulis, and slightly sweetened whipped cream. Utterly delicious. I completely forgot that I was feeling rubbish, such is the power of great Pavlova!

I've had two accidental gluten poisoning incidents since the colostomy, one was my own fault for not reading an ingredients list properly, a recipe had changed - previously gluten free, not any more. This weeks' bbq was worse. The colostomy means I get dehydrated more easily, so I feel awful quickly. My stoma nurse taught me to eat a banana, packet of crisps, and drink a glass of cola, it rehydrates you because it contains potassium, sodium and sugar. I wish I knew that 2 years ago, it really does work!

Calorie Boredom

I am afraid that I have become a calorie counter... In an attempt to put on weight I'm counting calories in order to eat at least 2500 calories a day. Recently, my weight has plateau-ed and I could really do with putting on another stone. I am keeping a food diary to make sure I eat enough every day, but now it's starting to dominate my conversations. I know at any given point in a day just how many calories I've eaten and which foods are the higher calorie options on the menu. Food is no longer fun, it's fuel. I can't enjoy something unless I know how much it's contributing to my daily target. I get panicky when I reach dinner-time and I'm not at least half-way through my quota. I love food, this is not right, I want to rediscover the enjoyment. I know it's not forever, but it's already boring me. 1175 calories so far...

Summer is here?

Officially, winter is over. Daylight Savings Time is a clue, so is my veg-box provider discontinuing their Winter Box. The part of my brain that is supposed to start craving salad and barbecue food at this time of year does not know. I'm still in the mood for soups and stews. What's wrong? I have on many occasions confessed my love of comfort food, but surely I need to get over this soon? I'm trying, my next veg-box will contain the salad box, and I'm attempting to go down the cold-meat-and-coleslaw route for lunch these days.

Perhaps it's the fact that the house we live in is cold all year round, or that every time the sun fights it's way out it rains, or maybe it just that the extra stressfulness of my life is pushing me to seek solace in warm and starchy comfort food. Whatever it is, I'm still a big fan of chicken. Roasted, poached, grilled, or pan fried, I'm happy. Then there's the stock. Risottos and soups are abundant. My craving for comfort food, at the moment, is constant. I finish one meal and I'm planning my next. I'm always hungry! I suppose it's a good thing, it'll help me put on weight. My dietitian is still concerned for my weight and I'd be happy to gain a kilo, or five. And yet, my weight has stayed the same all month, not an ounce, or gram, have I gained. Rubbish.

Well, I'm hungry and I have some chicken and pasta in the fridge...